You went through something devastating. You were broken beyond belief and have been forced to let go, move forward, and survive. There is no person in this world living this same story. There isn’t a single individual who can understand exactly what you went through.
Therefore, there isn’t any person who gets to put a time frame on how long it takes you to heal and move forward.
Sure, maybe these people in your life have been through something similar. There is a good chance quite a few of them have had some overlapping experiences. However, they aren’t you.They didn’t live your story and aren’t walking in your shoes every day. They don’t know what got you here and all of the events leading up to this pain. They don’t get to put a timeframe on your healing.
Frankly, it’s none of their business. If they want to move on quickly after a broken relationship- that’s their choice. If they are able to get back to daily life as if nothing ever happened-awesome for them. That doesn’t mean you should. That definitely doesn’t mean that you have to do the same.
You’ve been through a pain that no person gets to understand. You are left to grieve and put back together your broken pieces in however much time that you need. You are going at your own pace, one that is perfectly okay, for YOU.
So don’t let anyone tell you it’s time to move on. Don’t let someone make you feel like you are taking too long and you shouldn’t be feeling this way anymore. If it’s not your time, it’s not your freakin time and that is just fine.
You are doing perfect, just the way you are. You are strong. You are courageous. You are healing beautifully.
And one day, your broken pieces won’t hurt as badly. You will wake up one day and won’t be struggling to get out of bed. You will make it through a day and realize the pain you went through barley crossed your mind. You will go to sleep at night with a clear head and sleep comfortably without overthinking and nightmares.
Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but one day soon this will all get a lot easier. This will all become easier to bear.
Like a broken bone when it’s cold outside, it may still sting a little bit some days. You will walk with wobbly legs at first until you are finally ready to get your feet back on the ground. But with time, you will do it. You will overcome this in the most graceful way possible.
And the best part? Nobody gets to say you did it wrong. Nobody gets to have any judgment as to how long it took you to get here. You did it all on your own, at your own pace.
And you are here. You are surviving and you are living. You created your own destiny. This is another chapter in your story, one that you wrote entirely on your own. It is perfect.
Don’t let ANYONE tell you otherwise.
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Originally published on Thought Catalog.