When someone you love dies, one of the hardest things to grasp is the way that life continues going on even though this person is no longer with you. Everyone goes back to his or her own lives and you are supposed to return back to yours. All is supposed to carry on like nothing ever happened.
So we do. We go back to work and school and continue moving forward because we don’t have any other choice. For a while, we put one foot in front of the other while we go through the motions of getting through each day.
We do this, until one day we get into a routine. One day we start to realize that we are crying less and life is starting to seem more normal. It is normal in the sense that this has become the new reality. We start to get used to what this new life and new norm is.
Until something happens. A big change, a major life event. Something happens and it sets us a million steps back. It shoots us a massive reminder that our mom is gone and she is never coming back.
It brings us back into the downward spiral that is grief and has us longing for the person that was once our everything. It has this way of bringing the reality we are living to the surface and make us realize that we never really fully healed from the loss of this person, but instead, just started to get used to things the way that they were.
It’s a feeling nobody can quite understand. Not unless they have lived it that is. It’s a pain that you thought was gone, so when it comes back to surface, can even leave you confused as to why and how you are feeling this way.
Nothing about this is easy. Grieving your mother, the most important person in your life, is a life long process. It comes with highs and lows and never seems to get easier.
Even when we think we are starting to heal, life has a way of throwing us a curveball. The kind that has the ability to make us grieve our mothers over and over again.
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Also, here are some great resources for anyone who has lost a mother