You Are Never Alone In Your Struggles, Ask for Help
I’m in a dark place again. My depression is taking over. have so many emotions and I don’t know where to put them. I am fighting a battle with myself daily and some days are harder than others.
I’ve been here before though. I know this feeling all too well. I can instantly tell when I start to slip into this place by now. I’m more self-aware. I know what works and what doesn’t. But that doesn’t mean my unconscious mind always makes the right choice.
So I put on a brave face. For as long as I can. I do this until enough is enough and one thing, big or small, pushes me to that breaking point. And put it all comes. All the emotions, the anger and the sadness. It’s pouring out uncontrollably and I don’t even know why I feel the way I do.
It sends me back to that dark place. The place I know so well. The place I have tried time and time again to put behind me.
I fear asking for help. I fear letting people know because I don’t want to worry them. It’s easier to deal with it all on your own sometimes.
So I isolate. I try to avoid anyone and everything. I don’t want to try and understand something that doesn’t make sense. If all of this doesn’t make sense in my head, how will it make sense to someone else?
Because as we all know, not everyone believes that mental health is health. I mean, we don’t look sick. We don’t get to call out from work and get a doctor’s note. We feel like we don’t have a valid reason to stay in bed all day. So instead, we fight through it; we carry on, and we try with everything in us to fight through it in hopes that this will soon pass.
But that’s thing. Why do we have to feel so alone? Why is it so difficult to reach out for help? Why are we so afraid to cry and feel and let others know we are struggling?
Maybe if we took the time to tell people, they would understand. Maybe we’d learn who our real friends were. Maybe we’d learn who really cares about us.
I don’t know any of this for sure. But what I do know, is that we can’t fight this alone. It’s only going to make it harder. It’s only going to make it worse.
If you or someone you know is struggling: Suicide prevention hotline: 18002738255
Your life is worth it. You are worth it. Ask for help.
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